Trying to coax you
feels dishonest – and yet,
I do not know how to proceed
without you with me.
I love our usual rhythm
when you bubble up like a fountain
or surprise me with a flash.
The light you bring leads the way.
It is as if, like an eager child,
you grab me by the wrist,
pulling me with all your might,
to see what your wide eyes see,
to open to what is being born right before me.
This is our ritual,
our occasional awkward dance.
I long to know you better,
to deepen the intimacy between us
with more regular meetings.
I get jazzed when we can be together –
You, the lightening bug-
Me, the catcher.
But you are an unpredictable one,
mysterious in your ways
I never know when you will appear.
You are always in the driver’s seat
while I ride shotgun,
trying to trust in the route you put me on.
You show up,
and I am knocked out of my usual rhythm,
suddenly consumed by your presence.
I love those moments.
They are like electricity lighting me up
on all circuits.
It is as if
you give birth to me all over again,
but in little flashes of light
to direct my unfolding.
I dare not ignore your brilliance.
Copyright © Cynthia Cady Stanton 2017