Why I love the Morning

April 1, 2018April 1, 2018 becomingandbeholding1 Comment

I rise early

in the dark and quiet

on purpose.

Just like the blank page calls to me,

so does the new day.

I create an intentional pause

to reflect upon and bow to

the morning I have been given.

You see, for me

Easter happens every morning –

a chance to begin again,

to allow God to be seen

by transforming me.

The stone is always ready

to be rolled away

and a new way of being

is possible.

As the sun rises,

I reflect on whether this day

is finally The Day

I trust this truth completely –

the whispers of hallelujah gently call

so Easter can be born

in me

again.

We All Die Our Own Way

March 30, 2018March 30, 2018 becomingandbeholding2 Comments

We may wither and bend

like a broken flower,

close to life gradually

and fall quietly,

nourishing the life around us

as a life well-lived.

Or, we may get chopped down

violently, like a tree in its prime,

shaking the foundations.

How we die

is not up to us.

“I thought it would be easier somehow,”

said the patient.

One wonders if

the amount of presence we give to

the life we have now

informs and shapes

our own death, which waits…

It seems a courageous choice

to consider.

Poem · Poetry

Pure Presence

March 25, 2018March 28, 2018 becomingandbeholding3 Comments

You look at me with eyes of love

and complete attention.

You gracefully place your body

next to mine,

molding into me

for complete contact.

There is no space between us –

only pure presence.

As you relax and soften,

so do I.

Your purr

motors my heart to joy.

Your headbutts

nudge me firmly to awaken

to the affection in this moment.

Your eyes,

your eyes…

invite me to deepen

and embrace the music

hidden in my heart.

You bring God to me

and I am blessed.

I love you for that.

Eventually, you move away

to what is next for you.

Your work is done.

Poem · Poetry

Go Gently

March 22, 2018 becomingandbeholding1 Comment

Here I go again,

getting lost in the tangle of

outward motivations which

lead me away –

like an excited child

pulling on my arm –

Come this way!

But my wisdom within says,

Not so fast.

You have been here before, remember?

We play this game over and over

until finally,

we are done playing.

We are ready for change.

Like Jacob wrestling with the angel,

we finally get blessed with divine insight

into who we are,

and the exhaustion of repeated patterns

falls away.

Here is the truth of it all:

we come to God

through suffering or wisdom –

and sometimes both.

Most of the time,

we create our own suffering.

So, my child,

Learn to trust your

inner light.

You were born with it,

and it waits for you to listen

to its guidance.

Be patient with how it flickers

until you are ready

for its full shining.

Go gently on your path,

and keep your eyes open.

Forgive your missteps along the way.

Just keep moving forward.

And whatever you do,

do not close.

For your light cannot shine,

if your shades are drawn

and you will keep tripping in your darkness.

Poem · Poetry

What is Wrong with Faith?

March 20, 2018March 20, 2018 becomingandbeholding2 Comments

I do not have a need

to have all the answers,

I am okay with

What if?

The mysteries do not daunt or

haunt me –

rather, they amaze and

even comfort.

What happens if you get to the end,

and all the certainties you have proven

are wrong?

What then?

It makes me sad when

I meet a heart so closed.

How did it get so frozen?

Watch how the flower blooms.

It dares to open

in the light of the sun.

Poem · Poetry

Beyond Stuck

March 18, 2018March 18, 2018 becomingandbeholdingLeave a comment

Your mind is a place of learning,

she said.

You create your reality there.

My invitation to intentionally look within –

an amazing challenge,

even for a deep, open one like me.

Like a spinning top,

the hardest part is to stop –

it is so effortless to

just keep going,

settle for the mindless whirl.

When I do manage a pause and

a glimpse inward,

I am humbled by what is keeping me

busy up there.

Really? THIS is what I am thinking about?

The constant auto-pilot and noise

is embarrassing!

But taking it personally

is not helpful.

So much of what is in my mind

has been given to me

when I was not looking.

I am looking now.
I am now learning to peek within

with curiosity and gentleness –

and sometimes even, humor.

Laughing really does help.

Healing comes

with awareness and new choices

along with a large dose of humility.

Shaking off the old

and building the new…

I am learning to protect my consciousness –

what I allow in,

and what to ignore.

It is a dynamic classroom

in which I am

forever a student.

Poem · Poetry

Go With the Flow

March 17, 2018 becomingandbeholdingLeave a comment

The sun rises without you –

birds sing their morning songs, and

the cat plops in your lap whether

invited or not.

Coffee brews effortlessly, once started

and the aroma blesses you

with that warm feeling of being cared for.

Hunger waits until the body is ready

to receive.

Why think of food yet?

The day starts,

whether you do or not.

You do not have to figure it out

to make it happen.

Learn to receive, little one.

Respond when invited, but

do not move too quickly to action.

The sunrise is a beautiful blessing

which points the way

to true freedom.

It simply unfolds.

Do you see it?

It is right before you.

Poem

Blow Me Over

March 13, 2018 becomingandbeholdingLeave a comment

Pour me a cup of coffee

and warm me up

with that gooey, lovely feeling

of being with an old friend.

The movement within my heart

is like a gentle wave

which rocks me –

or a wind which moves me,

opening both my lungs

and my heart, simultaneously.

I could weep at the memory.

How I miss our times together!

We so took for granted

the easy geography of sharing the

parenting of our kids,

the unfolding of our lives as

women caught – but growing through,

the married-wifey-mommy labyrinth.

Each of our paths ended up so different

but what was lasting remained.

We will always be friends,

despite the winds of change which

move through us and

around us, seemingly threatening

our deep connection.

I am not daunted by the wind.

Rather than being intimidated by its roar,

I am moved by the ways

it pushes us together

and opens our hearts ever so powerfully

when we are together.

For that moment,

we can be home

for each other –

and that means everything.

Poem · Poetry

All Is Well

March 2, 2018March 2, 2018 becomingandbeholdingLeave a comment

How I wonder at

the many ways of getting it wrong –

the things that pull us away,

derail and distract us from

the truth of who we are

and how we were made

from the beginning.

Life continues to instruct –

through discomfort and pain.

It seems the most effective tool

to bring us to the necessary surrender.

I am not a fan of the process –

the reshaping and chiseling away…

but the revelations that come

reassure in ways

unmeasurable.

I yield to the master craftsman,

offering myself up for true fashioning,

despite the necessary struggles,

that the me that has always been

can be seen –

and true freedom,

finally mine.

Poem · Poetry

Begin With the Ending

February 18, 2018 becomingandbeholding2 Comments

You have already started your curtain call

and now we show up

with our unpunched tickets in hand.

Meeting you at this point

is like being presented with a gift

that has already been opened –

loved and appreciated for years –

and ready to be tucked away

for safe keeping.

All our hellos

have built in goodbyes to them.

The door to you opens

and begins closing

all at once.

We know this going in.

Time is short

and momentous.

It forces an instant connection

that is felt both ways.

We understand the courage it takes

for you at this point,

to drop your guard so quickly

for a bunch of strangers

who want to help.

And you do.

And we do.

In a way, it is kind of magical.

The delicate intimacy

that comes with sharing your ending

teaches us.

Teaches you to let go

in a meaningful way,

and teaches us what

letting go looks like.

We love this about

being with you.

Thank you for allowing us

to cut in

and share your final dance.

We promise to help you

finish it well.

Please take the lead

and show us your steps.

We will follow you

and share your curtain call.